It is unavoidably awkward to explain to folks (or even to not explain to folks) that you take off work to travel half way across the country to go to the doctor when you aren’t fighting some sort of terminal illness.
So, usually, I don’t explain myself.
I get some sort of perverse pleasure out of leaving people guessing. I am afraid I really do. It’s like dressing the elephant in the room in a safety orange vest with reflectors and flashing lights. And, it keeps me in control of the conversation. Which, frankly, is exactly how it should be when it comes to my health.
Am I wrong?
Having said all that, I have learned it is important for the folks near me to know about my health. You know… in case something goes wrong and I need help. And, I suppose, as I discussed here, overcoming my pride is a process that requires I practice often, and with consistency.
Now, don’t misunderstand. I by no means tell all.
I am guarded.
Extremely so. In many areas of my life, not just in regards to my health.
There are plenty of those awkward moments when someone asks where I’ll be for however many weeks I’ve planned to be away from work, and all I say is, “Out west,” or “In Arizona.” and just keep spelling “a-w-k-w-a-r-d” until the awkward stops, the topic changes, and/or they walk away.
Again, like I said. I just love dressing up that elephant.
But, really? It’s a need-to-know.