My Life with Fibro

Is it just me? Fibromyalgia and Clutter

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Last week I introduced you to my newest series… Is it just me? Well, here I am with the first installment thinking just that…

I am an only child.  I work 7:30-5:30, 5 days a week, 50 weeks a year.  I was an only grandchild for most of my childhood.  I am tremendously blessed to inherit furniture and other items from generous family members.  I am slow to get rid of items.  I rarely take my loads to the local thrift store.  I have many hobbies.  My husband teaches high school, writes for a Grammy Award-winning band on a weekly basis, and takes six credits of graduate school a semester.  We receive lots of mail.  We buy lots of gifts.  And… And… And…

I fight fibromyalgia.  And I fight clutter.

Since I started experiencing chronic pain and fibromyalgia symptoms in 1995 keeping an organized space has grown much more difficult.  Or, better put, the level of importance I place on keeping a tidy bedroom, dorm, apartment, home, office, etc. has reduced drastically.

Growing up I kept a clean room and playroom.  Sweats and I would play cleaning games.  We raced the clock, or a song, or each other to get a room picked up and I loved it.  I loved having an organized space.  I loved having a system.

During high school I managed to keep a clean room because, to be honest, I didn’t have a ton of time to get it messy.  College was another story.  (Which I will get into when I roll out my new FibroYouth site later this week.)  It was all I could do to balance my health and my schoolwork.  Clutter began to creep into my life.  And, though I make a weekly stand against it, it still has a prominent place in my life.

So, fibrofolks, is it just me?  Please tell me… do you fight fibromyalgia and clutter?  Does your fibromyalgia seem to promote clutter?  Does the clutter cycle tend to coincide with a fibro flare?  What do you do about fibromyalgia and clutter?

Let me know and I’ll let you know what I’ve started doing about my clutter.

25 responses to “Is it just me? Fibromyalgia and Clutter”

  1. Jenni Saake – InfertilityMom

    Definately not just you. I have dreams of someday writing a book about how I overcame the clutter monster, offering tips to others as well. And then I wake up and look at my stacks and piles and realize that it’s not going to happen any time soon!!!

    Reply
  2. Connie Arnold

    Never really associated the increased clutter in my life to the fibromyalgia, but I think you might have something there!

    Reply
  3. K8

    I am glad to hear it’s not just me!

    And Connie, I think I do have something here… I am not sure if it’s that I am too exhausted mentally and physically to get all proactive and start cleaning, or what. But I do know I go through phases… which I am getting ready to write a post about.

    Reply
  4. Irene

    I have clutter, always have. I get started decluttering on good days but then I flair up and poof clutter is back! It’s never ending for me.

    Reply
  5. Fibrowriter

    It isn’t just me! My clutter definitely coincides with fibro-flares. Both the mood flares and the pain flares cause my housework to back slide. I try to follow the FlyLady’s site to manage my clutter. i.e. 15 minutes at a time. If I’m flaring I might try five minutes…or just take a nap. :p

    Reply
  6. Rebecca

    I also have A.D.D. so I am not sure if my clutter problem comes from fibromyalgia. The fibromyalgia does make my ADD symptoms worse, though.

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  7. no smoking

    The same problem with me, I also have clutter everywhere and I don’t know what to do with it.

    Reply
  8. Lodge Girl

    Diagnosed FM w/ chronic back problems for last 10 years. Also the beginning of an unorganized. unkept, home with accumilaton of clutter. Low energy, & pain made keeping up the house a low priority. Earning a living and taking care of other needs took priority. House has gotten so out of hand that it has become very impacting on the sykie. Cleaning cycles do coincide with flairs and your emotional state of mind. Sometimes the clearing clutter just takes more emotional and physical energy than you have – -but is sure does feel good when your on a cleaning spree – the problem is they are inconsistent.

    Techniques like touch it once, or every thing has a space and place are great when you are up to applying the techniques – but they don’t work when your not able to work them. A support group may help encourage and motivate – any additional tips would be great for a resource when we are in that moment of functioning. Keep me posted on this

    Reply
  9. Kari

    It’s not just you, I’m glad it’s not just me. Glad I found your blog via twitter.

    Reply
  10. Tamicat

    Yay! We have company in our mess. =)

    The funny thing is that I actually love organizing stuff. I know that if I can get this place organized, my life will be less stressful and more peaceful. Getting there is the hard part. Whenever I try to do it though, I always OVERdo and then end up miserable.

    If I could learn my limits better, that would sure help.

    Reply
  11. Khürt Williams

    It’s hard to say but I believe the clutter in our home ( and my wife’s reluctance to throw ANYTHING out ) existed before fibro and BK ( before kids ). I’m the Organizing Minimalist (OM) and she’s the Chaotic Clutter (CC). We have costumes for our characters. While I yearn for Zen bliss she …

    Reply
  12. Amy

    I am quite the opposite with you here! I was always a clutter bug & kind of a slob! I would rather spend most of my time outside with my horses than inside cleaning & straightening. Since I got my Fibro diagnosis, I have a huge intolerance for clutter & filth. I don’t clean myself though…lol! I had to hire a cleaning lady, but you wouldn’t believe just how much I gave away to Goodwill & just threw away. It was kind of a nice release for me. I just get stressed out when I see clutter & mess now.

    Reply
  13. hagar’s daughter

    I thought it was just me! I have a low tolerance for clutter, but can’t seem to get a handle on it since fibro diagnosis 8 years ago.

    Reply
  14. Raven

    Cleaning definitely dropped on my priority list once I developed fibro. You couldn’t make me make my bed these days even if I felt good. It’s not dirty, it’s messy and that’s how I prioritize any cleaning that does get done. Messy doesn’t count. And if I’m having a flare, my clothes don’t seem to make it to the hamper. They stay in the bathroom where I took them off along with my shoes. I order out a lot or through some pre-prepared foods into the oven on those days too.

    Reply
  15. Cindy

    Clutter sucks more energy from you. When you aren’t flaring, it will help to get rid of clutter. If you haven’t used it in 6 months-1 year…..get rid of it. You will be surprised how little you will miss.

    Reply
  16. Miranda

    OMG! I’m glad to know it’s NOT JUST ME!! I was starting to think I was crazy or something. I too have a terrible time with clutter. And I hate a messy house! But I have more bad days than good and most of the time I just don’t have the strength or energy to clean it up. I hate it too because my husband just thinks I’m lazy or something and he gripes when he comes home to the same mess. If he only had a clue! (I wish I could get him to understand how debilitating FMS truly is!) But it’s gotten to the point that when we have visitors show up unannounced, we will meet them outside because I am embarrassed to let them see the mess. I hate that because I want to be able to have friends and family come over for dinner or just to visit.

    I do have days when I have less pain and more energy and I do take advantage of them. But it seems those days are getting fewer and further between. I too was not was this way when I was a teenager living at home. I always tried to keep my room clean and neat. That’s why it drives me nuts to see things laying around that should be in the trash or in it’s proper place. There’s some days when even if I’m hurting really bad, I just get disgusted and can’t take it anymore and will find myself trying to get around the house picking up stuff, only to regret it later because it brings more pain on my body.

    What frustrates me the most about this is that I have 3 kids old enough to help out and I’m like “HELLO! I could use a little help here!” But I’m afraid it’s teaching them to think that if Mom doesn’t have to do it, they don’t have to do it. So they attribute to the clutter because they just leave their things laying everywhere and they won’t pick up after themselves! It is driving me crazy and I don’t know what to do.

    Reply
  17. K8

    Fibrowriter: The 15 minute rule is alive and well in our home. We’ll set a timer or turn on a song and race to see how much we can get done before it’s over.

    Lodge Girl: Touch it once is the way to go, though I struggle sticking with the rule. I’m working on a follow-up to address how I manage my clutter issues.

    Amy: If I’m honest with myself, I too have little tolerance for clutter. I believe it overwhelms me and worsens my symptoms. Every time I step foot in a bathroom I ponder hiring a cleaning lady. How do you like it?

    Cindy: So true. I’ve been on a donation rampage these past few weeks… getting rid of all sorts of items. It feels wonderful.

    Miranda: I understand your struggle find the strength and energy. I’ve scheduled my, what I call “Martha Stewart” or “MS” time… every Tuesday from 6-8. That’s my time for household chores and organization. The routine has made it fun and doable. And if I don’t get it all done it overflows to Saturday morning, when my husband and I will work on the list together. Maybe you and your sweetie can have a family meeting and setup a system for household chores? I bet your kids will understand you need their help and step up to help. And everyone craves a routine. Good luck! Let me know what you figure out works for your family.

    Reply
  18. perpetualspiral

    Oh I so have clutter. Cuz I like to have everything within reach so I don’t have to get up, but then getting up is an obstacle course because everything is all around! LOL. And, tidying and cleaning take energy and a certain low pain level, don’t they. Clutter makes me feel even more weighed down on top of the fibro, but sometimes we just have to live with it because our health is more important 🙂

    Reply
  19. Julia

    Never thought about it. I’ve always been clutterful. I know as my symptoms have gotten worse, I am less motivated to clean. With my job went my cleaning lady. It was tough.

    Reply
  20. Emily

    I’m actually to opposite! I’ve always been pretty neat anyway but, I find that in the past few years (I was diagnosed in 2006 but had symptoms since 1998), clutter drives me nuts! I live with my boyfriend, who is a messy roommate and I constantly wonder how to convince him to straighten things up a bit. I love everything to have its place and I feel uncomfy in my own space when stuff is messy.
    I DO, however, sometimes have flares of messy-ness and YES, it’s definitely corollated to my fibro flares. When I’m feeling super gross, I don’t care if my house is gross. Plus, I’m more wiped out from daily activities and way less motivated to put anything in its place.
    I’ve read that it’s really helpful and healthy for fibrofolks to keep their home clutter free. It tends to allow for our aches and pains to fit in easier when everything else is orderly. Does that make any sense?
    PS- If anybody has hints on how to get a messy guy to put things where they go… I’ll take ’em!

    Reply
  21. Leah

    I believe I have had FMS since 1982;I was not diagnosed until 7 years ago. I have always had issues with clutter. But I was 12 when the pain in my knees started. Excuses, excuses, excuses!!!I seem to be able to do good for a while then I relax about it and it goes right back to the way it was, which is a cause of stress for me. I sit here now and look around, but can NOT make myself get started. I wish I knew an easy way to do that.I am so aggravated with it right now though, it won’t be long because I will go into a frenzy mode.Which,by the way, doesn’t help either.Sorry no advice just thought this was interesting and wanted to comment.Thank you

    Reply
  22. Jen

    I always try to do a little daily, but it is very hard to keep going at times. Just a little bit a day and eventually it will get better.

    Reply
  23. Teri BG

    Dear Kate, I just found your blog. It is now 2014 (September 12) and I hope you are still sharing your thoughts on this site. I did a search regarding Fibromyalgia and housekeeping / clutter and up came your site. I appreciate that you put the energy and time into organizing this site. I was diagnosed with Fibro many years ago and at that time the Internet was fairly new and there was a great message board support group. But it no longer functions. I started another smaller online support group back in 1999 and it lasted about a year until that company folded its web site. For the past fourteen+ years life has been busy raising my grandchild and attempting to keep the living space tidy. The older I become the less energy I have but I am thankful for a husband of 12 years who still works. It was harder at times in a different way when I was a single and raising a 2nd generation child on my own. I think the only comment that is worth adding to what I have shared is that guilt gets us no where. I am currently not in a major flare… so I attempt to divide up housework into small amounts of things to do and to take rests during the day. I am also attempting to de-clutter the living space by giving things away that we do not use within a one-year period. Why have stuff that isn’t used is what I keep telling family members. Recently I decided to allow a young woman to live in our home without charging her rent in an effort to have her take over the weekly housework and to help a bit daily with cleaning the kitchen. I hope this works out for our family and her. Any way I will check out the rest of your archive. Make a good day for yourself. Sincerely, Teri

    Reply
    1. Kate

      I am so glad you found me, Teri!

      Sounds like you’ve got a good plan for managing housework. I’d love to one day have some help, but for no my sweetie and I share by doing little things throughout the week and tackling the big stuff together on Saturdays. Sometimes we make a game of it. And we always break it into tasks with a reasonable duration, and plenty of breaks between tasks. Helps to keep it fun, with an end in site.

      Reply
  24. Marytb

    I have fibro and to me clutter falls into the same category of “noxious stimuli” as bright lights, loud noise and strong smells. My very best medicine is a clean, pleasant, organized home. Clutter makes me feel agitated, same as bright lights. I can’t feel peace living in the midst of mess. Keeping an organized home, day by day, is the major way I cope with fibro and avoid feeling overwhelmed. Also my logical mind knows that my muscles are not damaged in any way from fibro and that exerting myself to keep house is not really harming my body. The rewards of an uncluttered home are LESS fatigue because you don’t have to carry the mental burden of days or even months of undone work that is all around you. Remember. A big job is just a bunch of little jobs. Clean as you go. Vow to accomplish something every day to tackle the clutter. Make your home a haven of PEACE and ORDER and you will feel better. If you don’t who will?

    Reply

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